Wednesday, June 02, 2004

Haf u ever thot of how wonderful it is to just hav sumone to lean on no matter what?dat's what God is for..:)

hmmm feels weird... i guess i've been feeling like this the whole night.. not to mention not like myself actually.. i wondered why n i searched within...
stillno answer.. it's seldom dat i feel this way. a feeling dat leaves me numb...
it's like i'm lost...in a way.. i feel empty..not happy nor sad, not worried but slightly anxious.. hahah i think i'm reli turning 21? just said a lil prayer for my best fwen...rach darlin... suddenly afteprayin n talkn to God i felt somuch better..
i suddenly realised i haven't been doing some stuff i 'm supposed to do today... n maybe dat's y i feel weird...now i noe why.....i feel lost coz i feel like i can't ease the pain..even for my loved ones... i guess i tried to search for strength or for sumtin to offer in myself to others around me who're bogged down by problems... but i realise..i dun have it.. oni God does.. dat's y i felt empty... i'm happy but the same time not reli.. i'm sad but at the same time not reli too.. but i've decided sumtin this very day..dat no matter if u decide to be happy u will... doesn't reli matter what the circumstances r like.. i need to be certain of myself.. noe who i am n what i'm doin... den no matter what i'll b happy.. i need to choose the best out of things... i need to be the best i can be.. at least for my frens n my loved ones...
dunno if u gys out der udnerstand what i'm sayin.. but hwat i wanna say is we'r not God n we can't do everything even tho we wan to when we see ppl closest to us hurtin.. but sumtimes even just by putting an arm around dem... makes more difference den u'll ver noe... i'm tired ....dumb 8 am class again tmr... goodnite everyone...GOD bless n may His spirit minister to u ppl out der eevrn as u sleep....

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