After-uni life crisis syndrome...

it is a crucial time of my life now
where i've left the uni phase and
am now trying to move on to the next phase
- supposedly the working world.

I'm sure i'm not alone when i say
i do think there's more to my life
than just getting a normal 9 to 5 job
and just live my life from there onwards.

The truth is i AM looking for a job.
But when i think deeper,
i don't really just want to get any job.
What's my purpose? My destiny?
the reason God gave me breath?
I want to give and serve Him so much
but i just really don't know how to
go about it...

When i was in uni, i need not think much
about what were my goals, my aim in life,
plan for my future, what i've to do next..
Now all the questions are thrown into my face...
And i betcha they're not easy to answer at all..
And i wonder how ppl do it
how do they know what they need to do?
Some ppl say, just go ahead
Start with a normal job 1st
than job hop or something...

You know,some interviewers ask me..
" WHAT DO YOU WANNA DO?"
wow, such a simple question but
do u know how freakin hard it is
for me to answer that?
some ppl might say i think too hard,
JUST DO IT...
so when i'm asked THAT question..
i'll think reli hard...
ENGINEERIN? NON-ENGINEERIN? Customer service?
Sales? MArketing?

When i think harder...
this is what i came up with..
I know what i wanna do but in reality,
i don't know how to go about it..
My passion is music, singing,dancing,
the worship ministry, creative arts,
helping people,listening to their problems,
counsel them, do missions....
SO what now? do what? start with what
kinda job?

I feel like there's so much more i can learn
and so much more i want to contribute to society
I do think about getting a good paying job
like most graduates do....
But often i'm disturbed by the thought that
I know just CAN'T settle for some normal secular job
altho ppl always say you can be a shining light
for Christ wherever He places you.

But i really do not know where to go from here.
i'm like standing at a crossroads with
10 different directions.
I 've prayed and cried and asked God
and i just know i need to do something different
but i don't know how or where or when or what.
I feel like it's such a waste if i don't do
something concentrated in directly ministering to
ppl and reaching out to the dying souls out there
dying every second even as i'm typing.

My request, my dear frens is that you will keep me in prayer.
And i know most of you are.Thank you for dat =)
pray that someday i will know what my purpose
and my destiny is and how to go about it.
I really wish i knew what to do now...sigh
But i'm not letting go of hope and i stil trust
He has my best interest at hand altho i did not
get every single interview or job offers as i
would like to.

I've already sent out many resumes to different companies.
Truth is, i'm not enthusiastic bout working in a secular
company at all. And the fact that i haven't
gotten a good offer until now makes me think
that God has something specific in store for me.
I prayed that He 'd close all other doors and
only keep the door which He wants me to walk thru open..
and I"m still waiting for that answer from Him.

Sometimes,I am disappointed but i try to ask myelf
the logic of all the things that happen around me.
Maybe God has something different ,something greater,
a greater destiny,an awesome purpose.
And I really believe that.

Thank you to Sai Lou, Mel and kes who commented on my
previous blog... I pray that God's destiny will be
achieved in your lives as much as i wanna see it in mine..=)

Will I?

Will what i want be what You want for me?
Will i ever get to do what i love?
Everything that is inate
That is within me...
My heart and soul is crying out
TO be heard
in a different way
a Supernatural way
Will I ever be able to achieve
My dreams while i'm still alive
While i'm still breathing on earth
Can i ever accomplish my purposes?
All i'm designed to be?
Everything I'm created to live out?
To be the fullest of every potential i have

Will i ever find the courage to?
WIll i ever find the ways to?
Will i have the power & strength to?
WIll i, Lord?
Will i?

*Indescriable*

"Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You Know them by name.
You are amazing God
All powerful, untamable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God"

I went to Benny Hinn's Crusade in Sydney Olympic Park,
24th June in the evening. If you don't know who he is,
you can google him =)am sure u can find some answers.
He's known for his healing crusades. Some of u might b
wonderin what in the world are healing crusades?
Healing crusade's where MIRACLES take place. Where ppl
from all over the world come to get a touch from God
beit cancer, glaucoma, spina bifida, HIV, dislocated disc,
any kind of diseases and sickness u can think of,
it's NO MORE.

When i was young, my mom used to get all these video
tapes on Benny Hinn or other famous preachers who held
healing crusades n other amazing Christian events.
Sumtimes she wud lend to frens and some being skeptical
wud say things like," How do u know its' true? they can
easily pay dozens of ke leh feh to act? pretend they're
crippled den say Hallelujah,get up & walk"

I can understand where they're comin from. I mean
not every1's gonna so easily fall 4 these kinda stuff rite?
BUT i was der,in the flesh, Auditorium filled with bout 20
to 30K ppl. Benny Hinn was der on stage,he prayed 4 the sick
and diseased.The whole stadium lifted their voices & prayed.
After a while,he asked those who'd received their healing
pls come forward to da stage to testify.i was sittin high up,
i can c everything dat's happenin down der on main stage.

YOu know what i saw? Der were a couple of ppl in
wheelchairs gathered at the back. & i saw with my own eyes,
ppl gettin up from their wheelchairs & started walkin.
Tears kept streamin down my cheeks. Of coz they din just
straightaway jump up and started running. Some slowly pushed
themselves, inch by inch, some wud get up a lil den fall back
into their chairs. But they kept trying til finally they were
STANDING.I kept crying n praising God for what He's doin.

A lady who kudn't climb stairs for 5 years now,moved up
the stairs up to the stage 2 testify. A lil girl of 11yrs,
who had a car accidents few mths ago,had pain all over her body
is now free from whatever ache. A lady with glaucoma for 2 yrs,
she kudn't see but now she had clear vision. An aged man who was
on his wheelchair was now walking up n down the stage. A young boy
who kudn't play sports like normal boys & kud oni walk bt never
run becoz of his severe asthma condition, ran a whole big round
the main place downstairs and back onto the stage.

I told myself, I wished all those ppl who had been cynical
& skeptical were with me right now witnessing all these miracles
right b4 their very eyes. i mean,in Manglish," YOu think these
millions of ppl over the yrs so free to come n act nonsense
just for recording meh?" All these were real ppl and lives
which were touched n changed forever.

I'm once again in awe.I mean of coz i knew God still healed
ppl but it was my 1st time seeing it happen with my own eyes.
Once again, i'm just speechless and i rever at His Sovereignness.
He IS REAL and with dat revelation in my heart, i think i'll
fall dead b4 i can ever deny His existence. What bout you?

A journey to remember....

Duration : 2 weeks ( 23rd June to th July )
Venue : Albury and Sydney, Australia
Place of Stay : Albury and Castlehill,Sydney
Events : Benny Hinn crusade & Hillsongs conference
Places of visit : BLue Mountains
Fish Market,Sydney
Hillsongs Church,Hillsides
Rutherglen (Wine tasting)-Campbelss & Buller
Lake Mulwalla
Lake Humewier
Mount Beauty
Beechworth (famous for its bakery and sweetshops)
Animal Sanctuary, Albury
Faith City church, Wodonga Campus

It has been such an awesome 2 weeks=P the only thing
wrong with the entire trip is da FREEZIN COLD! i hate it
imagine HORRIFIC INVOLUNTARY SPASMS... YUpes dat's what
happened to me. LOls.Anyway i can't tell you what happened
every single day i was der. it'll be too long. so i'll
put up some pics and tell u stories. Ready for a journey
to remember? *grinz* LET's GO!!!


At Blue mountains =)


Did YOU See DATT!!!???We're not alone on planet earth anymore!*gasp*


Me n Darlin Sis at Sydney Olympic Park (hillsongs conference)
It was awesome bt we hardly had time 2 eat or rest XD


*Hey who're u and what're u doin in my territory!?!?*sez Wallaby
*idun care what u say,keep talkin cz u LOOK CUTE!!!*


At Fish Market in Syd. Had sum fresh oysters(YUMMY!)
lotsa seagulls and pelicans der!GREAT SIGHT!!!


Der u go!Proof dat we WERE in Sydney!Opera House
We were on cruise!Gorgeous view... Harbour bridge during sunset!!


At Watson's bay..
*Hey rach,dya tink if i stare hard enuff
i can c my prince charmin come ridin towards me?*
*well um,u can try.bt i can c sum seagulls now.WAnt 1?*


Chantal(cuz' gf),Sis,Me,Shannee(hot cuz!),NOreen(Mich Branch lookalike!)

Those are sum nice pics,look out 4 more on my frenster pg.
Hmm,Dis entry's gettin too long.I'll write another!HEH!
Cya in the next one!